No Limits

I was so inspired by Tuesday night's service here at my local church because there is something that I have been thinking about for the last month that requires a tremendous amount of faith and after that Rhema word, I'm ready to move.

First, let me back up a bit: On Sunday, I woke up with the song "No Limits" ringing in my head. If you aren't familiar with it, here are the simple yet profound lyrics:

No limits, no boundaries

I see increase all around me

Stretch forth, break forth

Release me/enlarge my territory

Take the limits off

The pastor at my home church preached about Lazarus (John 11). Actually, he preached about Mary and her measure of faith. She believed that Jesus could have healed a sick Lazarus; she believed that in death, Lazarus would live again in heaven for all of eternity. Yet, she didn't believe Jesus could raise Lazarus up who had been "good n' dead." My home church pastor also said there are three kinds of faith: limited, fundamental, and unlimited. Mary (in case you haven't figure it out) had limited faith. Then he admonished us to take the limits off of God and to pursue unlimited faith. God, afterall, can do anything but fail. OK, Lord, I'm listening...didn't you just tell me that this morning though that song stuck in my head?

Last Monday, I talked about how I got lost on the way home because I chose a different route (Just Wait it Out). Little did I know God was going to remind me of something that I abandoned over ten years ago. It has been my dream since college to become a professor, department chair, and/or dean and someday president of a college or university.

I cannot believe that I had forgotten that dream. God reminded me of the path that I had moved away from. As a matter of fact, now, I am remembering the favor that was given me to attend a university for a Master's degree specifically geared towards post secondary teaching. Had I stayed that course, I would be closer to my once forgotten, perhaps subconsciously dismissed dream. 

Now back to the present: last night my pastor talked about the children of Israel who were afraid to venture into the unknown when they were right on the verge...on the boundaries of the promised land.  However, they didn't have enough faith in themselves (which is bad enough by itself), but they didn't have enough faith in God. He challenged us on our level of faith. Are you willing look crazy...have you looked crazy for faith's sake? (So you know I'm jumping on the inside by this point; that's the title of last month's post).

It has been weighing tremendously on me to go back to school, get my PhD, and move in this direction that I believe God is leading me. I have no idea how I am going to pay for this, I don't know if I'll be able to get a job once I receive the degree. Can I admit that I'm scared? I like having a plan, that's my comfort zone. Yet God, especially this year, has been pushing me ever so gently out of my comfort zone. Who knew this was something He was preparing me for? Last year, I would have talked myself out of this but now... Well, now I am about to study for the GRE just in case I need to take it. Now I am going to respond to this email about an online class geared towards teaching adults. Now I am going to use any extra funds I get (no matter how small) to save for the cost of entry exams, transcript requests, and application fees.

Even though the fig trees have no blossom, and there are no grapes on the vines; even though the olive crop fails, and the fields are barren; even though the flocks die in the fields, and the cattle barns are empty, yet I will rejoice in the LORD! I will be joyful in the God of my salvation!  Habakkuk 3:17-18 NLT

I do not have a clue as to how this is going to happen. But I am so overwhelmed by the belief that this is God's plan, that I just can't ignore it. Habakkuk creates a list of everything going wrong in his life then he ends it with hope. I don't know what this future of mine holds, I don't know where the money is coming from, but I know that I will rejoice in the Lord. I will believe in God. I will believe in me. Then I will hope and see what the end is going to be.