It's Okay to Settle

Lately, a new emotion has stirred within me and for the last few weeks I have had the most difficult time trying to figure out what it was. It's not the familiar feeling of joy, which is so important to me and I treasure it dearly. It's not peace and contentment, also well known to me. They--much like goodness and mercy--follow me daily. I tried and tried to figure out what this new feeling was. Finally, one day while driving home from work, when I had resigned myself to leave this foreign thing alone, a word came to me while I was listening to the radio.

Settled - that's it.

Most times when we hear that word, it's usually not a good sign. As singles we settle for less than what we desire; we settle for less than what God has designed for our lives. It seems in this day and age, being content with singleness is absurd. I've been interrogated so many times about my love life (or lack thereof) and I am always encouraged to "put myself out there." Truth is, I don't really want to be "out there" wherever "that" may be. I'm okay...really.

My heart is settled. I am at peace with where I am. Now it is true that in the past, I have made poor decisions about the men that I've chosen to love. I have cried. I've questioned my worth. I've given up. I have allowed others' opinions about love influence my own, sometimes even to the point of drowning out God's voice. But now...not so much.

Please don't misunderstand me. I still believe in love and I still believe that somewhere, a man exists for whom I am the perfect fit. I don't expect him to knock on my door with a dozen roses, professing his undying love. Yet at the same time, I think that if I go looking for him I won't find him.

I sometimes wonder if I am an anomaly; or if I'm crazy for not being so man crazy. And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace [who imparts all blessing and favor]; Who has called you to His [own] eternal glory in Christ Jesus, will Himself complete and make you what you ought to be, establish and ground you securely, and strengthen and settle you (1 Peter 5:10 Amplified). I think it's safe to say that I've suffered a bit--I will spare you all the pitiful details--for love's sake. And even after all of my mishaps, miscues, and misunderstandings, I would not change a thing because each one has taught me something about myself, about love, and about God's character.

I wish that I could explain how I got here. But the only thing that comes to mind is "due season." 
I('m) settled and I wouldn't have it any other way.